


Dear, Connor Murphy

by verystrangehuman



Category: Dear Evan Hansen - Pasek & Paul/Levenson
Genre: Alternate Universe - Everyone Lives/Nobody Dies, Angst, But he's still a punk, But treebros is end game, Connor Deserves Happiness, Connor and Miguel are dating at first, Connor is a nerd, Fluff, M/M, No smut (at least for now), Treebros, What am I doing with my life?, first fic on AO3
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2019-09-03
Updated: 2019-09-03
Packaged: 2020-10-06 01:21:19
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Underage
Chapters: 1
Words: 728
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/20498537
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/verystrangehuman/pseuds/verystrangehuman
Summary: What if Connor never saw the letter?What if Evan and Connor sparked a real friendship?What if Connor never killed himself?OrMy interpretation of what would've happened if Evan had never written that letter.





	Dear, Connor Murphy

**Author's Note:**

> This is my first time on AO3, so... Please, be at least kind of nice?  
I know this fic will have the standard whole shabam, including very depressed bois... So that means, that there will be self-harm and talk of suicide and stuff like that, there will also be cursing. Also featuring meme-boi Kleinman! Because we need some laughs in there now and then...   
Enjoy I guess...

Evan woke up to the sound of his phone beeping loudly into his ear. His eyes shot open and he sat up quickly. He did have a loft bed, so naturally, his head hit the ceiling. He clutched the top of his forehead and tears budded in his eyes. Well, wasn't this an amazing way to start the first day of school? He was suddenly painfully aware of the alarm on his phone still blasting, so he grabbed it with the hand that wasn't on his head. He turned the alarm off, and grabbed the sides of the ladder on his loft and climbed down. He grabbed his phone as he climbed down the ladder and as soon as he was off of the thing he pressed slightly on his forehead making him hiss in discomfort. That was most certainly going to have a bruise by the end of today.

He pulled his hand off of his head and made his way to his dresser. He opened a drawer and found identical shirts of different colors. He grabbed the baby blue one, he didn't particularly like baby blue, but it was a color, so why would he spend thirty minutes trying to figure out which color shirt to wear when he could randomly grab one and some light khakis.

He walked into his bathroom down the hall from the room he was in before with a long sigh. He looked at his reflection and grimaced at his hair. He tried desperately to tame those ruthless curls, but he only managed to make himself look slightly presentable.

He grabbed his mom’s concealer (their skin tones were only slightly different), and put some on the purple bags under his eyes. He rubbed it in and looked at himself again, he looked slightly better.

He knew he'd never feel like his face, body, hair, honestly, anything about him was good, but he was trying to improve his looks, so others would at least think he looked fine.

He walked into his room again and pulled out his computer, opening Google Docs and beginning to write his newest letter.

_Dear Evan Hansen, _

_ Today is going to be a good day and here's why; today you're going to school again for the first time in two months. You'll get a fresh start with social interaction. Since no one ever notices you, you could probably say you're a transfer, and that's why no one's ever seen you before. You can separate from Jared, and finally, meet people who care about you!_

Evan quickly hit backspace and held his finger there until his letter only went until the semicolon. Dr. Sherman would surely see he was lying like a dog if he kept the letter like that, so he started over.

_-today school starts up again, and you'll be able to talk to Jared, after having no one to talk to except yourself for what feels like the longest time. Sure, Jared's not ideal, but beggars can't be choosers. School may not be the best thing in the world, but you'll make it through the day. You'll live._

Evan nodded to himself, this didn't sound way too optimistic but didn't sound as depressing as it would be if he told the whole truth.

He found footsteps were coming towards him and hit print so that the wireless printer his mom could somehow afford would print the short and sweet letter out.

"Hey, honey!" His mother greeted as her head popped through the doorway of his room.

"Hey Mom," Evan replied in a far too depressed tone.

"Can we try to have an optimistic outlook, huh? Can we buck up just enough to see the world won't fall apart? Wait, I know! You can go around today and ask the other kids to sign your cast!" She exclaimed happily and grabbed a sharpie from the cup on his desk full of writing utensils.

"Oh, great..." Evan replied, halfheartedly.

"I'm proud of you already," His mother said.

Evan nodded along, hoping she would just get the hell out of his room already, and for once he got what he wanted.

He had a bad feeling about today, he just knew things would be bad that day. But, he was used to having that feeling so he just ignored it, and for once that was a good idea.

**Author's Note:**

> To everyone who's reading this, I'm so thankful for you!  
I swear that the rest of the chapters will be much longer than this one!  
Please comment, they keep me motivated, I don't even care if they're hate comments if you care enough about this fic that you wanted to communicate something to me, that means I'm drawing at least some people in, y'know? Anyway, enough about that, just please comment..!
> 
> <3


End file.
